The ticking clock hanging over the heads of Pakistani women often leads to early marriage before the woman has fully developed as an individual. Actress,song writer,tv host and singer Komal Rizvi shared her experience of marriage at a young age and how it hurts her.She shared about her abusive marriage and how her ex-husband abused her physically and emotionally on Nadir Ali podcast. She shared one incident where her husband hit her head with frying pan for serving cold food. “Girls have been told since childhood that you would have a wonderful wedding and that your husband would really take care of you. The woman,especially in our culture, is 200% trying to keep the marriage going, not 100%,” she said. “I have one complaint with our society and it is not to teaching our daughters what their lineage is. If you forget your husband, you lose your self-respect, your confidence, your self-esteem.Youcan no longer trust or believe in yourself, and if you let them cross that line, your happiness will be ruined. No one told me.”
“It took me four years to realize that if he raises his hand to me or oppresses me, it’s not my fault. Mind games such as “It was your fault that I hit you with a frying pan, why did you serve me cold food?” while he was playing mind games, I thought that if I loved him more and tried harder, he would be happy with me. I wouldn’t even raise my hand to a dog,forget people.
Rizvi stressed the importance of setting healthy boundaries. “It took me four years in that stupidity because I wasn’t taught how to draw the line. It’s a sin to accept that. If someone had told me that, I would have made a decision in half a year, and three and a half years would not have been wasted.”
The “Washmalay” singer said she was taught to take care of her husband, cook, and always obey her husband’s parents and elders.She agrees these things are reasonable On the other hand, he stressed that the other side also needs to be addressed, such as the need to educate women to set boundaries.This is really a serious and heavy subject.The actor said Pakistani women needs to set strong boundaries.She emphasized that they need to be taught that they will not tolerate disrespect or abuse from anyone.
